My new book, the hilarious and violent follow-up to Gigantic Death Worm, is now available. Find it here on Amazon – DEATH MACHINES OF DEATH. And for the low price of $10.95, EVERYONE can afford a copy! Check it out! It’s the best book EVER!
DEATH MACHINES OF DEATH
All machines suddenly come to life for some reason and go on a rampage to kill every human being on the planet. It’s kind of like that movieMaximum Overdrive, only ten time as fucking brutal!
Welcome to the Big Old Gaylord Opryland Resort! Do you lack the energy to get a date? Are you batshit insane and looking for a cure? Are you a pants-shitting senior who wants to stop being old? Do you hate Stephen King? Then, this weekend, there’s a seminar for you! Sure, there’s a comet flying through space bringing all machinery to life and killing everybody, but don’t worry about that! Here, have a sandwich! Visit our many attractions! See our massive convention center (of death), our beautiful atrium (of death), and our arcade (of death)! Ignore the massive senior citizen orgy. Don’t talk to the kid in the wheelchair. We guarantee the elevator will not transform you into a cyborg. Mr. Coffee isn’t trying to kill you. And there is absolutely nothing suspicious going on in the basement. (Don’t go down there though, seriously).
Take a load off, have a good time, and prepare to die!
Death Machines of Death is an apocalyptic horror comedy by Vince Kramer that just so happens to be a million times better than anything you’ve ever read before. And if you think for one minute that those boring literary classics like The Great Gatsby or Moby Dick are better than this, then you’re fucking stupid!
Here’s what some people are saying about DEATH MACHINES OF DEATH –
“Vince writes books that are so bad they’re good, so stupid they’re awesome, so utterly brutal that they’re mind-numbingly retarded. It’s almost as if he’s making fun of everything you hold dear in serious literature. I can only compare his hilarious anti-novels to Axe Cop or Real Ultimate Power: the official ninja book. If you’ve read either of those you’d begin to understand this guy’s sense of humor. Basically, he’s the best author ever.” – CARLTON MELLICK III, author of The Haunted Vagina, I Knocked Up Satan’s Daughter, and many more.
“Vince Kramer puts the `bat-sh*t-insane genius’ into bat-sh*t-insane genius. This book is worth your time simply for the meta-argument asides between its Narrator and its author, but those are interspersed throughout an equally ridiculous, hilarious, wonderfully self-aware story about death machines and sandwiches and the mentally challenged. This book is as offensive as it is funny. It really is the best thing, ever.” – STEVE LOWE, author of I Am Sloth, King of the Perverts, and Muscle Memory.
“Kramer has surpassed his absurdly grotesque debut, Gigantic Death Worm, with his sophomore offering. Fans of his first book will find much to like in Death Machines of Death. Meta-humor runs throughout, playfully exploiting genre conventions and plot holes to hilarious effect. Oh, and I’m pretty sure if you are the type of person who gets offended by ideas, you are going to be horrified by this book. It’s a pinnacle of politically incorrect satire, and it actually manages to deliver some surprising emotionally satisfying points.” – GARY AUTHOR BROWN, author of Kitten.
Death Machines of Death now available on Amazon.com.
Also, my New Bizarro Author Book, Gigantic Death Worm, has been re-released by Eraserhead Press with a NEW COVER –
Reissue of GIGANTIC DEATH WORM also available here on Amazon.com.
And check out my new 2014 Action Figures Fucking Calendars. Available on this page on my blog.
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